Looking for in a woman
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Am I just crazy? 25 Reasonable Qualities I’m Looking For in Women: Confessions of a Professional Online Dater. As a male who refuses to settle for just any nice girl, here are 25 reasonable and realistic things that I am looking for when first getting to know someone.
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Am I just crazy? Online Dating And Relationship Expert. This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email. Lately, I’ve been thinking about the type of woman that I want to end up with one day. I think I pretty much have it nailed down completely. After a life time of pondering my dream woman, I’ve decided that she must be exactly five foot ten, should have piercing blue eyes, long dark hair that flows beautifully and the body of a super model. Her favorite color must be blue, and finally, she simply must be the world’s most gifted woman behind closed doors. No exceptions. Okay, so maybe I sound a little bit delusional. But as crazy as that sounds, it isn’t very far off from the absurd and never-ending checklists that many single women seem to have with the men they date. If I had a dollar for every woman who was five foot five or shorter that told me she would only date men taller than six feet, I’d be a very rich man. And don’t even get me started on all the other absurd requirements I have heard over the years. Well, I’m here today to get real. While the above depiction of my dream girl was clearly an absurd and hyperbolic exaggeration created to emphasize the lunacy that takes place in the mind of many single people, I do indeed have reasonable expectations of what I am looking for in a woman. As a male who refuses to settle for just any nice girl, here are 25 reasonable and realistic things that I am looking for when first getting to know someone. The question is, am I just crazy? 1. When we meet for a first date, skip the handshake. Business partners and co-workers shake hands. I am neither. So don’t treat the date like we are about to conduct a meeting. Unless you are completely repulsed by the thought of even touching me upon first glance, let’s keep things on a date level. 2. This is not an interview. Randomly switching topics throughout a date as if you are conducting an interview is the lowest form of date conversation. Some women march into dates as if they are on an agenda to assess every aspect of your life in thirty minutes flat. You are not Barbara Walters, and I am not atoning for my sins. Let the conversation evolve naturally and the important qualities you are looking for will come out over time. 3. Don’t be a brick wall with your emotions. If you are interested in me, let me know. flirt with your eyes a little bit. Touch me on the arm when engaging in conversation. If you are into me, make the effort to show it. 4. Reach for your wallet. Let’s just say I’m not exactly old school in this regard. When women offer to pay for the first round of drinks or insist on paying for the second round, this instantly ups my interest. No, it is not because I am a bum that wants a sugar momma to take care of me and pay my car bills. It has absolutely nothing to do with money, and I will almost always refuse to take it. It’s the gesture that I love. This reveals to me that I am with a woman who is kind, generous and not in the slightest bit selfish. More importantly, I know that these qualities will likely carry over into all aspects of our future relationship, not just monetarily. 5. Listen to me when I speak. There is nothing worse than a date that just talks over you, without registering anything that is being said in her direction. Many single women are guilty of this terrible habit without even realizing it. The frustrating part is that many of these women are genuinely sweet and nice people. But I am on a date to have a great time, not to be ignored. If I felt like being talked at for two hours, I’d be having drinks with my grandmother. 6. Show your femininity. At the end of the day, men are visual creatures. Women are beautiful by nature. Take advantage of this. Take the time to highlight all those beautiful features you have. Leave me thinking about how great you looked long after the date is over. 7. Let me know that you can hang with the boys. This is a huge one. If there is one thing men are immature about, it’s worrying about what our friends think of our girlfriends. Nobody wants to be the guy whose friends make fun of him behind his back about how lame his girlfriend is. Most men are babies when it comes to worrying what our friends think of us. So show me both appearance and personality-wise that I can feel comfortable bringing you around my friends. 8. Bring something unique to the table. First dates can be so monotonous after a while. I want to learn something about you that separates yourself from everyone else. Show me your secret talents, tell me a crazy story from your childhood, share a secret. Anything that breaks the monotony of a typical first date is always a good thing. 9. Don’t brag to me about all your accomplishments. Nothing impresses me more than an accomplished woman. This is incredibly sexy. But let this information come out naturally. Don’t sit there the whole date listing all the great things you’ve done at inopportune times. This only makes me think they you are self-absorbed and way too eager to prove yourself. 10. Laugh at my jokes.
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